Shake your tail feather

Today I had lunch with the husband, and let me tell you, it was people watching galore.  Now, besides being a passionate tambourine player, I also thoroughly enjoy studying the masses trying to figure out what exactly it was the persuaded them to don a pair of short jorts and a mesh tank top (besides trying to demonstrate their awesomeness).  As I was soaking in all of the khaki pants, stiletto heals, short jorts, parachute pants, and one man that I was unsure if he was even wearing pants, I hit the people watching jackpot.  There, sauntering in front of me was a man decked out in a three-piece tailored suit, and wait for ittttttttttttttttt.......a RAT TAIL dangling gloriously between his shoulder blades.  From the shoulder blades down this man was all business, capital B.  On the upward path it was a rat tail party, that was daintily braided and adorned with a hair tie.  I had to hold myself back from pulling on his tail tapping on his shoulder and suggesting that next time he should add a bead to the end.  I thought it would make it more whimsical.  I then let my mind wander, and thought, when he's having a bad hair day, does he just brush it out and let it free flow, so to speak?  Tuck it underneath his collar? Does he decorate it with hair tinsel during the holidays?  Possibly a feather?  And then I wondered if he topped it off with a scrunchie in the 80's, but then ruled that out because I figured the scrunchie would've been like an anchor on his magnificent tail, tipping his head back like a Pez dispenser.  My thought bubble was eventually broken when the hubster directed my attention to a man that was wearing a plaid jacket and big, white shoes.  I thought my head was going to explode from all of the brilliance before my eyes. 
That's all for today.  I'm going to go continue trying to convince Leonard that he should grow a rat tail, because I want to brush up on my french twist skills.   :)